The Real Dad Podcast
Each week, these four fathers cover a wide range of "Dad" related topics, from the joys of watching your child grow up to the challenges of balancing work and family life. With their unique blend of humor and authenticity, Dave, Joey, Brian, and Mark provide a refreshing perspective on what it means to be a dad in today's world.
Tune in for the laughs, stay for the heartfelt conversations about the struggles and triumphs of parenting. Whether you're a seasoned dad or a soon-to-be father, "The Real Dad Podcast" is the perfect place to connect with other dads and get the support you need.
Join us on this journey of fatherhood, and subscribe to "The Real Dad Podcast" today!
The Real Dad Podcast
Finding Joy in Fatherhood's Chaos
Ever wondered what happens when dads get together and speak their unfiltered truth about parenthood? This episode captures the raw, hilarious reality of fatherhood that rarely makes it into parenting books.
The conversation kicks off with candid Father's Day reflections, where Mark shares a touching moment of coming home to find his children had created a surprise celebration with homemade signs and streamers. Another dad reads his son's brutally honest school questionnaire: "My dad's favorite color is, I don't know" and the priceless "My dad makes the best... he only cooks sometimes." These moments of unintentional comedy from children become treasured memories, despite the occasional roasting of dad's abilities.
Dive into the fascinating world of "dad math" as one father explains driving an hour to save $70 on a deck box at Costco. The hosts share survival strategies for weekend warehouse shopping with kids, including the mortifying moment when a child starts chanting "dead fish!" at the seafood counter. You'll laugh as they debate the merits of different Costco locations and admit to driving astronomical distances just to avoid crowds.
The podcast takes an unexpectedly insightful turn when discussing strategies for handling children's meltdowns. Who knew that singing during tantrums engages both emotional and rational parts of a child's brain? Or that deliberately naming colors incorrectly will distract even the most upset toddler? These field-tested techniques come from the trenches of parenthood, not theoretical parenting manuals.
Marriage communication gets a hilarious examination when the dads share the memes they exchange with their wives—ranging from flirtatious jokes to pointed "hard pill to swallow" parenting reminders. Their honest assessment of unrealistic parenting advice (like dimming all house lights 90 minutes before bedtime) will have you nodding in agreement.
Join this authentic conversation about the beautiful mess of fatherhood. Whether you're a parent looking for solidarity or someone curious about the unvarnished truth of raising kids, this episode delivers laughs, insights, and the comforting reminder that perfect parenting doesn't exist—but real, loving fatherhood absolutely does.
Because you know your kids fill out that form at school.
Speaker 2:Yeah, of all the things about dad.
Speaker 1:I love whoever his teacher was who did his. I like big ups for her because she just wrote down exactly what he said, word for word. She didn't try to like make it up what he should have said or anything. So a few of the highlights are my dad's favorite color is, I don't know, mom's is green, mine's green too. My dad likes to work outside, I think. And my personal favorite, my dad makes the best. He only cooks sometimes.
Speaker 4:If you got some time to relax your mind, come have breakfast with the Real Dad Podcast. Hey, this with the Real Dad Podcast. Hey, welcome to the Real Dad Podcast. I'm Dave and I had a Jumbotron moment on the weekend at the Jays game.
Speaker 1:Got to dance on the Jumbotron, found it. Throw that out there.
Speaker 3:Hi, I'm Joey and I got one tattoo and then my second tattoo was covering up my first tattoo. I wish I could cover up my first tattoo. My name is mark and I have an ingrown toenail and it hurts really, really bad they suck and I can't get it. Yep, no, they suck. It's like I don't know what to do about it.
Speaker 4:Don't have any advice for you.
Speaker 3:Thanks, I was looking for it. I was really hopeful actually, that you, of all people, would have the advice for me.
Speaker 4:Nothing, I'll just suffer loudly over here. I'm Brian and I got nothing, but I got a new friend beside me, so that's fun. Welcome to the podcast, paul Cronin.
Speaker 2:Thanks for having me so much.
Speaker 3:He can introduce himself.
Speaker 2:I'm Paul and I'm a reality television star.
Speaker 1:Oh, you need to tell us a little more. Now I gotta check your imdb page.
Speaker 2:My wife and I bought our first house on property virgins, on hgtv I didn't know that what season oh, I don't know, like six or something, it was back. It was the first host. So, oh, wow, sandra rumomato, or yeah that's very exciting.
Speaker 1:How was that experience?
Speaker 2:I didn't know, that about you it was an eye-opener for sure, because I'm not in the tv industry, so it's like okay, yeah you don't know what you're getting into until you do it, but it was a fun experience.
Speaker 3:We enjoyed it how many houses do they actually take you to?
Speaker 2:as many as you want, so they film two, and then they wait until you buy one, and then they film that one and they may reorder them, but they yeah, yeah, okay, and then they filmed that one. And they may reorder them, but they Okay.
Speaker 3:And then do you have to play it up Totally. That's so funny.
Speaker 4:The magic of TV, that's it.
Speaker 1:I can relate with you, mark. I had one when I was a kid. I had to get surgery on it, ingrown toenail, yep.
Speaker 2:And the guy botched it.
Speaker 1:Botched, now I got a really messed up left big toenail Can.
Speaker 4:I see it, our foot doctor takes care of ingrown toenails. And he can do your other stuff while you're at it.
Speaker 1:Dude, I don't know, just go see him With my left side. It grows up out of the left side, oh, my god.
Speaker 3:So you have a little hat to look forward to.
Speaker 4:I can't even see the face on that one.
Speaker 3:Oh my god, it's so off. I've never seen a man show another man his foot like this before I was trying to give him more light shadows.
Speaker 4:I didn't even notice Joey's arch, though he's got a great arch.
Speaker 1:I've got a dancer's arch. You could be a ballet dancer. Look at that and that's with it clipped. It grows up. I feel like an alien nail there. Oh, my god, look at that and that's what they clipped. Yeah, it grows up. I feel like an alien nail there, oh, my god it gets sharp and when that bad boy catches on the sock when it's sharp it is awful or the
Speaker 3:bed sheets.
Speaker 1:It'll get you. Oh my god, so don't get a messed up surgery on your ingrown toenail.
Speaker 4:Go to the right guy, talk to Will.
Speaker 1:Will your ingrown toenail go to the right guy talk to will will jacob, will jacob?
Speaker 2:yeah, I might have him take a look at it, but now I'm just scared to get it done again.
Speaker 3:You know, he'd probably, he'd probably if he'd fix it up nice, I know he would so ever since he told me it was turf toe, yeah, and then ever since you told me that you fixed yourself with chachi bt. Okay, that's what I asked chat gbt do, and it basically said just elevate heat and ice, which solves pretty much all of life's problems for the most part yeah no pain, chat.
Speaker 2:Gbt didn't tell you to go see a doctor about it no, it will eventually, if you get enough advice eventually. It's like I should probably tell this person to go see a really good movie I don't know if I can be liable for this hey, now yeah, I thought my ingrown toenail was bad, but yours is that's the after effects.
Speaker 1:It's fine now?
Speaker 3:well, it's not fine no, it's hard to look at.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no, for sure it's. I'm embarrassed about it, but not really.
Speaker 3:I showed you and you took a picture, so well, okay, I'm sorry about my reaction. If If you're embarrassed, about it.
Speaker 1:I don't whip it out very often, but when you're in front of friends and family.
Speaker 2:Those photos may or may not be on the internet tomorrow. They are on me.
Speaker 4:Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1:They're on his phone, so they're already on me, do you?
Speaker 4:post pictures of Joey's toe to the Patreons.
Speaker 3:Is that something?
Speaker 4:they want to see I did it to Brian, whatever raises money, Dave.
Speaker 2:Whatever raises money. A bunch of new.
Speaker 1:Patreons Wow alright. Joe Moore toe picks, let's go. Joe Moore fucked up toe picks, let's go. So one thing moving right along.
Speaker 4:That I thought we should maybe get into. Today it was Father's Day.
Speaker 1:We missed Father's Day. We missed Father's.
Speaker 4:Day a little Father's.
Speaker 1:Day talk. We jumped right over.
Speaker 4:How was everybody's Father's Day?
Speaker 1:So mine's interesting because mine actually ended up happening this weekend, this past weekend, yesterday. There you go. So we did make up Father's Day. Well, because we did also our episode post-Father's Day was about Mark's wedding, because you had your wedding on father's day weekend. Thank you for that. You're welcome. Um, actually do. Thank you for that because we ended up a night away from home and it was a beautiful morning. I just didn't see my kids much Um. So yeah, ours was a makeup one this Sunday.
Speaker 4:Kids is not a requirement of father's day. No.
Speaker 3:And when, like, do you get this conversation?
Speaker 1:yeah, we've had this conversation a few times so mine's a sleep in in the morning for sure, like that's. That's a big request. What time is the crack? Uh, it does depend on the day, what we have on the go. So this time was nine o'clock in the morning, was my wake up when they eventually came in shit, that's high noon at my house.
Speaker 3:That's not even close to a sleep in. I can't make it to nine o'clock. That's really if I try to sleep, bro, if you're not getting to 10, then it's not a sleep in. I don't think I ever sleep Fucking 12 my wife and.
Speaker 4:I will sleep in bed till 10 On the weekend.
Speaker 3:Some weekends I have not slept in 10 o'clock. It is glorious. What do you wake up and get ready to go back to bed 10am. What the?
Speaker 4:hell is wrong with you. If it's a rainy day maybe that makes sense, but on a nice day outside, I just love that early morning sun.
Speaker 3:Get up and enjoy Maybe that's true, there's nothing good about the early morning.
Speaker 4:What are you doing? That's completely false.
Speaker 1:But Joy and Dave are a good combination of both non-morning people.
Speaker 2:So then when you have that marriage, that nobody's a morning person.
Speaker 4:They've always locked in on that. They're made for each other.
Speaker 3:They've always locked in on that I appreciate that about you. I love an early morning coffee. I don't even know if I know you Late morning coffee is even better.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's coffee number two.
Speaker 3:You can't have a startup which is not as good as coffee.
Speaker 4:number one you can't start a coffee at 10.30 in the morning. My kids have had seven snacks before you have woken up in the morning exactly, and after going through that many mornings of kids waking you up, needing food, needing all the things when they're old enough to handle themselves in the morning and you get to just wake up on your own accord to not have anybody wake you and just be like, oh, I'm so refreshed right when does your accord wake you up?
Speaker 3:because mine's like 7.
Speaker 4:8.30 is a sleep in.
Speaker 3:No matter what you're waking up. At that time You're all alone.
Speaker 4:I can't sleep past that. I just feel like I'm wasting the day. I feel like your parents have drilled that wasting the day terminology into you.
Speaker 3:No, I used to sleep until 2 in the afternoon.
Speaker 4:I have a sweet moment in front of my kitchen window every morning when I wake up on a. Saturday. Okay, we're standing in front, the sun shining in through the windows, make my coffee. It's a nice little process that I go through.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I'm not surprised your coffee is probably top-notch oh top-notch coffee for sure, like a barista coffee.
Speaker 4:That is my calm. What's happening in the background.
Speaker 3:Are the kids still asleep?
Speaker 4:pure chaos. That's what I'm picturing.
Speaker 1:I'm picturing slow motion just Sinatra and just pandemonium slow-mo pillow fights, I mean, I'm really going to ignore them On the weekends.
Speaker 4:if they start turning it up like that, I just send them outside, that's it Then it's peaceful again, Wow so Dave's a slob. We have Gus here too, remember.
Speaker 3:What about you, Paul?
Speaker 2:When do you?
Speaker 4:wake up. What's your?
Speaker 2:routine I usually on a weekend, weekend. My wife actually usually has me sleep in 9, 30, 10 o'clock but are you kidding me. My kids are up at lawns to mow, you got fucking you got shit to do on a saturday morning as a dad and you two guys are sitting in here just caressing pillows
Speaker 3:counting your thread count what the fuck?
Speaker 2:I've got like. My kids are up at the crack of crack 6 am or whatever, but they always go to mom. They don't go to dad so it's a curse for her.
Speaker 1:Maybe she might hate you for it my kids have taken the taking turns, so they'll. They'll do like a couple of weeks of of going to mom every time, and then they'll do like a couple of weeks of going to mom every time, and then they'll do a couple of weeks where they come to my eyes. I don't know how they decide, maybe until they just piss one of us off enough but like, oh yeah, that tone in the morning, like all right, I better switch to the other parent robin is an angry waker upper, my wife like she.
Speaker 3:So I think because I'm growing up, I would sleep the whole day away I, oh yeah, one time I slept for legit 30 hours. Oh wow, I went to bed on a tuesday and woke up on thursday.
Speaker 2:It was wild but like I I don't like.
Speaker 3:I shouldn't say I don't like I gotta maybe I start over. No, I don't want to start over, but when the kids get wake her up on the wrong side of the bed, it's not fun for anyone and there's no coming out of that. So it's like, subconsciously, if I, if I hear it, I'm good to go, I'm like nope, let's go, let's roll sounds more like a self-defense mechanism well, no, it's fear, fear-based, for sure, 100, but I'm okay with it because I never realized how beautiful the mornings were.
Speaker 3:But I love waking up, I love going outside. You get that little fresh air kind of hit in the morning and I just kind of like do little breaths before I go in and try not to kill anybody but like that said truth gun, have you ever pretended to be sleeping when the kids come in, did you just say? Truth gun yeah, like you have to tell the truth.
Speaker 4:What the hell is a truth gun? I've got you at the end of a gun.
Speaker 1:You have to tell the truth, also known as the truth gun. The truth gun or truth game, truth gun.
Speaker 3:This isn't real. This is normal. Yeah, it's real thing. This is a thing. Heard this before tell the truth we'll start over.
Speaker 1:Uh, have you ever pretended to be sleeping when you hear the kid come in? Just hoping they go over to the wife. And even if they come over, yeah, I don't have to. They always go to maddie's. I've, I've become very good and I I feel like I've told magnus I'm a very good fake sleeper.
Speaker 1:She does not know, I know guarantee you she does not know because I've heard her have conversations about me sleeping and the conversations that she has with the kids are ones that she would have thinking that I'm asleep with the things that she said so you've got some dirt.
Speaker 3:Oh, I always can't say it because I gotta hold on.
Speaker 1:You're gonna wait for the rainbow. Oh you're damn right, you know what she's?
Speaker 2:she's gonna start planting stuff and saying stuff yeah.
Speaker 1:So when you pull that up like you were awake, I knew you were awake, but I know that I can never bring it up because then I will lose the upper hand of being able to pretend to sleep. I don't, I don't have that issue my uh, my wife.
Speaker 2:It was. One of the things she hates is that when I fall asleep, I'm dead, okay yeah and I could sleep on a rock, on a hard floor on a chair like it's my biggest problem when I'm working is I get home, I get done, I get. You know, if I sit on the couch, my body's like oh, it's nap time we're sitting down.
Speaker 1:We're not doing work.
Speaker 2:Okay, this is time to fall asleep so yeah, it drives her nuts how fast, like in like three seconds, I can fall asleep, I can just drive, yeah, unless you're listening to the real dad podcast and then it doesn't matter where you're sitting, so I think we're talking about shut up for a second, have you?
Speaker 3:have you seen the video?
Speaker 2:that's my gun have you seen the video?
Speaker 3:where the kids like fake sleeping in the back of the car. Yes, they're like, oh, when they're really asleep. We did that to my son, so we're like he now fake sleeps like every time we go on a drive. We come back home and he just goes like this. We're like, oh, no, he's asleep. And then he like a little smirk and I'm like you know he's in a deep, but we've done it so many times now that he's like I'll pick, I'm chest his hand and you pick it up and he just holds it in the air. He's not that tired, though, because both his hands aren't up, and then he just like slowly starts raising his other hand.
Speaker 4:It's so funny to see in real life.
Speaker 2:It's awesome.
Speaker 3:Everyone needs to try it.
Speaker 1:That's so funny.
Speaker 3:Sorry for shooting you with my shut up gun. No, it was good.
Speaker 1:I'll take it any day. So yeah, I could make a Father's Day.
Speaker 1:It just becomes an easy decision day. That's kind of like my to Meg's thing For her Mother's Day, my Father's Day it's on the books. You don't have to make any decisions that day, unless you want to. It's like if there's a good spot, you want to go for dinner, you can voice it. Other than that you're not making any of the decisions. You're not the one getting up off the couch when the kid asks for stuff. It's just an easy day. Yeah, that's our go-to.
Speaker 3:I'll get back to mine. You go, brian okay.
Speaker 4:Well, my father's day was ruined by my anniversary, my anniversary was on the 15th, wow, which was also father's day.
Speaker 3:Which anniversary the day after my anniversary. No, pick up Father's Day.
Speaker 4:My anniversary was on the 15th Wow. Which was also Father's Day, which was also the day after your wedding.
Speaker 3:Wow, that's a big day it was a wild weekend. Yeah, that is a wild weekend.
Speaker 4:A wonderful weekend, but yeah no, Father's Day was basically just our anniversary this year. Sweet. So I got like little gifts from the kids. So I got little gifts from the kids, so I got a couple things to add to my keychain and, yeah, it was good. It was pretty chill. That's sweet.
Speaker 3:Well, how about yours?
Speaker 2:I kind of have a two-part Father's Day. I went on Friday before I played golf with my wife's uncle or two uncles and her cousin, nice. So I got to go and golf, which was nice. And then on Sunday the kids got. They got some gifts for me. So I got woken up, I got to go downstairs because the kids are very excited for me to open my father's day gift. So I sit in my chair with my coffee and they bring the bag out and my son sings me happy birthday, because he was so excited, they bought me a clock from the dollar store a marvel clock with all the avengers on it for my office, because the clock on my wrist and my phone and my computer aren't enough.
Speaker 2:I need a clock in my office too.
Speaker 1:So that's good, but it's up on the wall because I would destroy them if I didn't so you do what you have to for the kids nice, mine was quite nice.
Speaker 4:Um, obviously we were at the wedding. So then the next morning waking up, had a nice little breakfast on the dock, yeah so the noise of the beautiful sounds of the birds, um, but we had some just like nice alone time with me and my wife, which we haven't had a lot of because we're sleeping all morning, obviously, um, we had a great little conversation on the deck together had a nice coffee, some mimosas, you're watching the sun and just enjoying it.
Speaker 4:But one thing that I missed about it was I enjoy my kids coming up with breakfast in bed on Father's Day. I like to be celebrated. I don't mind being celebrated, I enjoy it.
Speaker 2:I've always loved it. I couldn't do it. I can't food my celebrated. I enjoy it. I have always loved it Lean in. Yeah, I can't food my bed. No, no, no chance.
Speaker 4:It was the same way it was because I remember Mother's Day and Father's Day I would always like make them toast and bring it up and it was like that thing. So I kind of wanted that my same way. But so we're coming home from the wedding and I was a little sad that I missed out on that like traditional moment that we would have and get in the door and the kids had a babysitter while we were at the wedding open the door to a chair in front of the door with a sign on it that says if you're a dad, go this way oh sweet and I turn, I'm like this is adorable.
Speaker 4:They took green streamer like a streamer kind of thing, and like hang them from one of the door archways and I like turned the corner and they put little like presents for me on the couch and then my daughter wrote dad on pieces of paper and taped it up to the wall and like had like a big thing for me when I got home with their little things and they're like daddy and like gave me the moment I was like I didn't need, like I wasn't expecting it at all.
Speaker 4:I was expecting to walk in the door and them to just be doing their own thing, playing. But they had, like taken the time and set it all up and like, when we got into the driveway we even sat in the driveway for a little bit talking before we went in, because you're like and wanting to enjoy that alone time a little bit more. And then it was just they blew me away. I was super surprised by it, nice I wanted to read.
Speaker 1:I got meg to send me just a quick little thing on my as well, because you know your kids fill out that form at school yeah, um of all the things about dad I love, whoever his teacher was who did his.
Speaker 1:I'd like big ups for her because she just wrote down exactly what he said, word for word. She didn't try to like make it up what he should have said or anything. So a few of the highlights are my dad's favorite color is, I don't know, mom's is green, mine's green too. My dad likes to work outside, I think. And, personal favorite, my dad makes the best. He only cooks sometimes.
Speaker 2:I just love those little word for word, because I know that's exactly what he said.
Speaker 1:That's so funny.
Speaker 3:Here's my thoughts. We moved Father's Day to yesterday, so we went out for dinner and Robin took the kids away so I could do some work. That was my. I loved it Very good. But should you be able to bank those holidays, because they're just made up holidays anyways? But, like In my perfect world, we would not celebrate Father's Day on June, whatever, okay, and I would move it to like the opening weekend of football.
Speaker 1:I don't mind this concept at all. It could be an IOU.
Speaker 4:Yeah, I mean, you're still just allowed to have days though.
Speaker 1:It's not like it has to be an IOU. That's a fair point, but a pro transaction. Let's talk the same thing. That's a fair point. Hold on.
Speaker 3:You can have two days, you can have a day, but you can't like. It's like you can have the day, like having a day in June is nice, but like September, yeah, yeah, yeah, football it's everything you've hoped it would be. I love my kids and if you're listening to this, something's probably happened to me. But anyways, I love you, but I miss the days of those football Sundays where I would just dave my way all day, waste the whole day on the couch watching games. I think you could ship Father's Day.
Speaker 1:I don't mind.
Speaker 3:I think so because, if I did that, it would be a better sell yeah.
Speaker 3:Right Because if I just went like, hey, babe, hear me out, instead of just watching the Eagles game, what if I watch all of them? Just pause All the games From 9 am to about 11.30 at night Football all day. She'd say here are your papers. But if I said I don't want to do Father's Day this year, I think I'm going to bank it. I'm going to bank it until later in the year. Oh, oh, okay, that's a good, good idea.
Speaker 1:Now, I was trying to be sneaky about it. I don't like where this is going, but this is my.
Speaker 3:This is why I brought it up front I think you let her know.
Speaker 1:Hey, I would love to move father's day to a different day. If that's cool with you, I'd love to do a september football father's day. Can I make that happen?
Speaker 2:I think it could work better when the kids are a bit older. At school they're making a Father's Day gift.
Speaker 1:Then they go back to school.
Speaker 4:The next week and they're going to talk about what I got my dad I don't want to give him any gifts. My dad moved Father's Day to September.
Speaker 1:They're going to write that on their little card for sure, valentine's Day.
Speaker 4:We're moving that to the summer.
Speaker 2:Who wants to celebrate in February. All his friends are going to go home and tell their dad yeah, my friend moved.
Speaker 1:Yeah, to.
Speaker 2:September and their dad's going to be like, oh my god, that's the best night of his life.
Speaker 1:We're going to have a Canadian movement On our hands. Come over to my house. This is what I'm saying. I'll barbecue.
Speaker 3:Nah, howie will barbecue, yeah.
Speaker 1:Howie's, howie's gonna barbecue for sure we got to meet Howie. That's big news too for the listeners, because you've heard us talk about Howie so a couple times. The rest of us finally got to meet Howie a couple of times over the wedding. He's a great bachelor party in the wedding day. He's love you, howie, you're a good dude yeah, but Howie's not here and Paul Cronin is so, paul, tell us a little how uh life been going.
Speaker 4:You said you had some quotes you wanted to read, didn't you?
Speaker 2:yeah, so I've been dealing with a bit of craziness in my life recently, so I full transparency. I had to binge watch or binge listen to about four episodes to get caught up, so I got some quotes from my favorite quotes from the last three or four episodes.
Speaker 3:Hold on, shut up for a second, so I got some quotes from my favorite quotes from the last three or four episodes Hold on Shut up for a second. Just for context, paul Cronin is a long time listener, very OG back in the day, that's true. Just had to slip that in there.
Speaker 2:No, it's awesome, All right. So the first quote I got is uh, from our good friend mark. Uh, you lose more than you win. When did I say that three episodes ago?
Speaker 4:that's a good one I feel like that's uh parenting truth yeah, okay.
Speaker 3:No, it makes sense with parenting. Yeah for sure.
Speaker 4:I mean the podcast is a parenting podcast, fuck is it?
Speaker 2:Yeah, it is.
Speaker 3:I thought it was about me. Some people listen for advice.
Speaker 4:I think no way.
Speaker 1:They're reaching out to toenails for 20 minutes. Listen, we've been telling them not to take this as advice the entire time, but I think they do.
Speaker 3:I still listen to this, for advice, toenails and sleeping in till noon.
Speaker 4:That's what you get when you listen to this fucking show and they keep coming back. We're going to get more sponsors.
Speaker 3:Hey babe, I found this real good show. You had to be there but they talked about ingrown toenails sleeping in and moving Father's. Day to football.
Speaker 2:Sunday. The second quote from our friend Joey in the corner. There's a lot of times of the day that can be the worst time of the day. That is absolutely.
Speaker 3:Usually it falls from like 3.30 to 7. There's hot spots.
Speaker 1:Those are like peaking.
Speaker 2:Tie the shoes, brush the teeth, get ready for bed.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's just anything where you need them to do anything.
Speaker 3:Yes, really yeah, we, yeah, so yesterday was like our fake father's day and robin, we're driving home from our dinner and she's like do you want to do bath or do you want to do dishes? And I said a thousand times, dishes, yeah, for sure she goes, she goes you hate? Doing dishes? Yeah, for sure, she's like the, she goes, she goes. You hate doing dishes. I was like there's nothing I hate more than bath time and kids. If you're listening, I love you, but fuck, I hate bathing you dishes is just quiet time.
Speaker 4:It's the bet, it's like low-key, the best.
Speaker 3:But the sink is it like? When you are above a certain height, you have to bend yeah, for the lower back and it's like it's. It's literally like an inch and a half of a nuisance, and there's nothing you can do but stand obnoxiously wide yeah, and then it shrinks you down and then you're comfortable. I'm like, oh my god, if I was at this height I wouldn't mind doing the dishes, but that fucking bend, I hate it.
Speaker 1:It must suck, being way above average height. Bro, if you put one of those anti-fatigue mats on the floor you
Speaker 3:stand on one of those.
Speaker 1:Well, I can't talk to you about it because you're sub-six Average Average height, but you know what I'm talking about. It's painful.
Speaker 3:It is painful, it's hard to do Remember.
Speaker 4:Mark holding Mav at the wedding.
Speaker 2:That is what we get to when you're getting low on dishes.
Speaker 1:It's true, never had that issue once in my life.
Speaker 4:It's very true, suck it.
Speaker 2:All right, all right. Next quote this one's deep. You're going to like this.
Speaker 1:Mark this one's deep.
Speaker 2:When someone's drowning, it's not the time to teach them how to swim. And that was a quote from Mark, who was quoting his wife Robin, who I think might have been quoting Confucius or somebody else.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Confucius or somebody else?
Speaker 4:Oh yeah, confucius, and you said something else, confucius, I forgot that.
Speaker 1:What's Confucius? You didn't even say that, though, no you said something else. I forget what he said. What's Confucius Constance or something I don't know.
Speaker 3:You said not the philosopher. Anyways, constantine.
Speaker 4:I don't know, don't know. You said, not the philosopher. Anyways, yes, constantine, constant, I don't know it doesn't, but that is a great saying it is. It is that one. That one hit me. Yeah, we should put that on a shirt. On a shirt, I don't know next one's from brian.
Speaker 2:It's just, brian barely speaks he found one.
Speaker 3:Wow, he did some great research. When he does, it's cool, it's just little fires is, you're not wrong.
Speaker 2:It's just little fires everywhere when you're a parent Little fires everywhere.
Speaker 4:It's very true.
Speaker 2:It's very true and the last quote is from Dave it's don't sign your kids up for anything in life. It's not worth it.
Speaker 1:That's a fact For anything in life.
Speaker 4:life that's so good and that's why you come to the real life podcast.
Speaker 2:For real life, it's so good so the best part, because I was compiling these I read them back and I'm like you know, when you read these back back to back, you're like it just sounds like being a parent is the worst but I think we'll all agree it's the best thing we've ever done.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's just really not easy. Um and then uh. So this brought me to uh, another quote, and it's not from the show, but it's from our good files at bluey um and uh, it kind of brings all back into in the context that um, the episode was called mom school and bluey um asked her mom when she lost one of her balloons, which was her children. Yes, she said, does that mean I failed mom school? And her mom said yes, but we all fail sometimes. But you get another chance tomorrow, so I always thought that was a great.
Speaker 3:That fucking show gets me every time.
Speaker 1:I've never cried so much at any show.
Speaker 4:It's insane man, unbelievable you know what blew me away. I was chatting with my sister and she was talking about how to entertain her three year old and I'm like, oh, have you ever watched Bluey? And she was like, no, I haven't watched that. Somebody had told me that it's awful and that it just has very bad principles for the kid, like it's teaching them how to be misbehaved.
Speaker 3:Are they talking about Caillou? Because?
Speaker 4:that's.
Speaker 2:Caillou.
Speaker 4:Bluey is like incredible. It is like parental therapy in each episode.
Speaker 1:We don't give advice on this show, but the advice that we do give is watch Bluey.
Speaker 4:I never knew there was another side of people who didn't like Bluey. Everyone was like you need to disown this friend. I love that they.
Speaker 2:They made bluey shorts because the eight minute episodes are too long those little eight minute episodes are like.
Speaker 3:The reason why they're eight minutes is because you can't emotionally handle it anymore.
Speaker 4:Yeah, anything longer is too much so, going back to the my quote of uh, don't sign your kids up for anything, okay, um, following up on swimming lessons. So swimming lessons are done, okay, officially done. You made it to the my quote of uh, don't sign your kids up for anything, okay, um, following up on swimming lessons.
Speaker 2:So swimming lessons are done.
Speaker 4:Okay.
Speaker 2:Officially done.
Speaker 1:You made it to the other side.
Speaker 4:You made it to the other side. She did great. She had so much fun. She even made a friend in her class throughout it. Um, but as part of the convincing her to go, we had a reward system. So the kids have wanted pets forever. Oh no, but we're not. My wife's not doing a pet and we don't want a pet but they are very jealous of the kids in their class that have dogs or cats or fish or all these different pets like, yeah, birds, whatever and we have nothing. So then part of the deal was we'll get you a fish and a fish tank. If you do your swimming swimming related you know you're turning into a little fish. So each time time she went she got to get something new.
Speaker 1:So she got this little fish tank and then the pebbles to go inside at the next week he had to lead up because they had gotten there, so we got all the things she got to go at the end of her.
Speaker 2:You really don't pay attention to these episodes.
Speaker 1:But, he was picking up on that You're going to fall asleep in three seconds.
Speaker 3:I forget like that.
Speaker 4:So she got to get the fish. So they went to the store and they got these three little guppies and they put them into the tank and they were so happy.
Speaker 2:It's a real fish.
Speaker 4:And next day one fish dead. Next day, another fish dead. My wife learned that, uh, those type of fish need more air and more oxygen at the surface level in order to survive.
Speaker 1:Thanks, you need a bigger tank, wow, wow. So you created a kill tank for guppy, so not?
Speaker 4:only did we get through that. Then we had to deal with the crying of losing the guppy, so two of them died, one of them was still there and we got a bigger tank. We're like, okay, we gotta drop a hundo on this. Now get a bigger tank and fill it out.
Speaker 2:I think that's how they get you, because my niece just went through the exact same thing. They bought her a tank, they got her fish right. They had like four fish and one died the next day.
Speaker 1:One died the week after, two days after, and I'm like and they bought her tank.
Speaker 2:I'm like, are these guys doing it? Did they purposely sell her the tiny tanks just so then you'll?
Speaker 1:get in, get invested and then, buy the $500 tank. What if the fish that can survive in that small tank there's not one, if you bring the dead fish back, they'll give you half off the next fish.
Speaker 3:That's not real. It's a real whale.
Speaker 1:That's not real. Why? That's a lie. It's like an insurance policy. No.
Speaker 4:No, this is true, so they eat the fish.
Speaker 1:My wife didn't know.
Speaker 4:So the first fish she flushed, and then the second fish she froze it so like put it down she froze it Like the dead fish so that you could bring it back. She's like I don't know what to do with this.
Speaker 3:Why they just flush it. Did I feed it to?
Speaker 1:the snakes? I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker 3:They probably would feed it to some other, like even turtles and what's the markup on a fish where you can just give you half off for a carcass.
Speaker 4:There must be a lot.
Speaker 3:I mean there's no production Anyway so we went from three fish in a small tank to now having, I think, there's 10 fish in a much bigger tank hold on, I don't like getting ripped off and it sounds to me like you can just walk into one of these and be like yo.
Speaker 4:I know that if I hand you a dead fish if it dies within the first, like whatever three or four days of you purchasing it so if it, didn't transfer.
Speaker 3:Well yeah, insurance, well yeah because I mean coming in uh, to the store from somewhere else I'll just catch a fish in my backyard and fucking bring it in there's the policy for saying, yeah, you can't just bring it with dead fish.
Speaker 1:Hold it by the tail, sir, that's still on your fishing line I went to costco today. I saw three dead fish for fucking $17.
Speaker 4:That is not a guppy, that is a bass.
Speaker 3:I want my money back. I paid good money for this guppy Sir.
Speaker 1:That's sushi.
Speaker 4:The real dad guy is back again.
Speaker 2:Does the return policy state that the fish has to be equal or lesser value?
Speaker 1:What are we moving up to here? I want a shark, yeah.
Speaker 2:Nothing less.
Speaker 3:Nothing less will do, but I want a shark, the best shark. Lessons were learned.
Speaker 1:You shouldn't have gone with the fish hold on, though.
Speaker 4:Hold on, we've got fish. Yeah, we got your own way to a small aquarium.
Speaker 3:So on the on the topic of dead fish yeah, it's my son's obsessed with fishing. Yes, we saw that we go to costco on our weekends now as like because we hate ourselves. But yeah, costco on saturday, do not advise. His favorite thing is to. They have like legit fish, dead fish with eyes still in it, oh wow, and he loves it. He's like can we? And now I'm in, I'm embarrassed because he's in his like cart and he goes can we see the dead fish? Dead fish and we're like, I'm, I'm not.
Speaker 1:It's like it's the most crowded place on earth.
Speaker 3:On earth and it's like, and they funnel you in and you got to scan the card now it's not this favorite store yeah who said that stats. It's literally packed all the time.
Speaker 1:I never go it's bad, never go well, but she does, yeah, yeah, so she goes during the day.
Speaker 3:On a weekday, they open it up early now for VIP members. Oh wow, get in early.
Speaker 1:Gotta have that. Early, yeah, early. Anyways, he starts his dead fish chant.
Speaker 3:No one else is chanting, so now I have this like temper tantrum. It would be weird if people joined, in.
Speaker 4:Yeah, you this like temper tantrum it would be weird if people joined in.
Speaker 1:I'd probably join in, though, if I heard a kid chanting that in Costco I'd jump in on board you gotta show support. You gotta, you gotta grow fucking just out there have you ever tried to start a chant it's the most awkward thing ever. It's just you like it's not normal behavior.
Speaker 2:My son and daughter love when we go um. They have the octopus. It's like vacuum packed, yeah, and you can like, like you can touch the tentacles to get the texture.
Speaker 3:They go nuts over, yeah, so math like we bring them through, and it's at the courses at the back of the store. So my I married my a psychopath. She likes to go through each individual friggin house yeah, love her to death.
Speaker 1:But fuck not, she's just a newbie.
Speaker 3:On a saturday the worst is the clothing session. Like we have never bought clothes from you. Don't need anything from this section and we gotta go sniff all these fucking socks. Get out of here. Anyways, we I take my kid to see these carcasses and it's saran wrapped and you can feel the same sort of texture. Now he's petting a package of dead fish and you think I just gave this kid a switch to be just in his glory loving life, dad, you would not believe that it's so good, that's a good one.
Speaker 3:His mouth is still open. I can see his teeth.
Speaker 2:I'm just picturing the scene from Dumb and Dumber with the blind kid Pretty bird yeah.
Speaker 3:That's basically what it is.
Speaker 1:He lives for the dead fish at Costco. Buried and closed. He lives for the dead fish at Costco. I'm buried in clothes.
Speaker 2:I got to go to Costco for the first time with my family. I also never go.
Speaker 4:She always goes during the week. I felt really bad. It was one of those gong show moments that was so bad, I was just laughing. My son was pumped about it. We had two carts, one for the kids and one for the stuff.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's brilliant, Smart. Yeah, that's a good hack.
Speaker 4:So he was pushing the one cart with the kids, the other kids in it and he was pumped about it, like to be able to push the big cart around the store or whatever. He's doing a great job. We decided to get ice cream before we leave the store. Get ice cream before we leave the store, yeah, and of course it's like 45 degrees outside, oh yeah. So we go to the parking lot and he's trying to push the cart and eat his ice cream at the same time but, he's seven.
Speaker 4:Oh my god, his ice cream was just disintegrating and he just turned to milk. Oh my gosh, I have not seen him that mad like a long time he was just losing.
Speaker 3:Bro, it's Costco it gets everybody.
Speaker 2:I thought you were going to say he let the cart go to hold the extra key. No, no.
Speaker 4:He really wanted to push the cart. And he didn't want anybody to help him. But he was also getting so mad that his cone was getting soggy, yeah, and he was slapping the. I'm like how does that make sense? He was getting so bad because he was getting messy too. I'm like you're just a hot like literally a hot mess anyway, it was just one of those complete gong shows.
Speaker 4:That was funny, because afterwards we just maddie and I, just had a good laugh about it. Did you go through the whole in-store trip? Yeah, we literally went there for one thing and then we discovered that they didn't have it when we got there, and then we just walked around the store to get samples yeah, and then, of course, you pick up some stuff along.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, you still end up spending $200. A trampoline, a trampoline as one does.
Speaker 3:Literally I go to get the trampoline. On the weekend we went there because Robin's dad bought this deck box, okay, and he sold me on the deck box. Anywhere else they're like $400. We're in Costco $199. I'm like that's a good deal, that's not a bad deal, that's a great deal that's not a bad deal, that's a great deal.
Speaker 4:That's a, that's a level of dad, that's a dad deal you can't turn down stuff like deck
Speaker 1:boxes, yeah, for sure so, dad.
Speaker 3:So here's where we went wrong, dad.
Speaker 1:That's another great t-shirt. That's a great t-shirt on the on the slippers, that's so dad.
Speaker 3:So we, we are in the, and I've been flirting with buying a pool, like one of those things, and Costco's got a mean deal on pools. Yeah, oh, I didn't buy it just so you know, but I was like real close. So we play this game with our kids called the garbage truck game, where they ride on the side of the cart and then we pick a thing thing and then they run and grab fake garbage and put it in our cart and then they hop on and I can yeah Nice nice nice.
Speaker 3:So we are playing the garbage truck game, but there's so many people that they have to be inside the cart. Yeah, okay, so we don't have a flatbed cart. We get there and there's like a whole stack of these deck boxes, right, and at this point we've been through it and we want to go home and I'm sitting there. I'm like we don't have a flatbed and I can't fit the deck box on here. So, like, what are we going to do? She's like I'll just order it online, it'll be totally fine. Okay, no problem. So while we're ordering it online, online we'll buy the pool, because you can't buy the pool in the store. It's online only. Okay, so we get home, put it up. The deck box on the costco online is 269. So here I am in my dad era, being like knowing damn well, I'm not gonna spend 70 dollars.
Speaker 3:Now, this is where the dad math doesn't add up, because I live an hour away from my closest Costco and I drive a pickup truck. No, this is dad math Truest form.
Speaker 3:Dad, math doesn't make sense. I'm not paying an extra $70 when I know damn well, tomorrow I'm going to be driving by that Costco. I'm just going to stop in Costco, I'm just gonna stop in and I'm gonna get it. So, yada, yada, yada, on the way here, I leave a little early and I drive in. I get into the battle. First of all, I don't have my card and they make you scan your card now. So I text my wife. I'm like can you send me a picture of my card so I can scan it? She goes I don't think you can do that. I'm like I can fucking do whatever I want. I pay for this membership Wrong, you can't.
Speaker 1:So but you can have your card on your phone? No, you can't. That's not a huge one. You need it on the app.
Speaker 3:Yeah, the app Can't have the picture of your thing? Yeah, so she sends me the picture. So, anyways, these two people are flirting because they're part-timers. Now it's a Monday, right, you got the part-time staff in there, oh for sure, so they don't care about their job, which is awesome for me.
Speaker 3:So I walk in and I'm sneaking through, pick me up a sample, go to where the deck box were I shit you, not less than 24 hours ago Not there Cleared out and I go. This doesn't make sense. The universe is good to me. You've been on a roll with the universe lately. The universe is very good to me. This shit, it just doesn't make any sense. There's like I don't know. So I go and I walk around the corner. I have pictures. There's three left on a skid and now it's down to 159.
Speaker 1:Hey, that's big news, and I got my flat.
Speaker 3:I've got my bed now. I just load that puppy up, boom, get back flat.
Speaker 2:I've got my my bed now. I just load that puppy up, boom.
Speaker 3:Get back for your gas, bro. I'm telling you it's, but they get you. The trick is you gotta go on the monday after the weekend because that's when left. You need get what's left and and you don't complain about it because that's where the deals are get upset get. Yeah, that's a quote. That's what's I had I had a, I had a thing and a reason why I was going here with this, all right, but I can't remember, I believe you, we were having
Speaker 4:a good time and we needed to bring it down. A notch.
Speaker 1:We'd like to celebrate that with you there's no place in the world.
Speaker 2:I would rather be on a saturday than a costco like.
Speaker 3:Costco, it drives me bananas.
Speaker 2:So I live in Milton, and so there are three Costcos within 20 minutes of Burlington.
Speaker 4:Oh wow.
Speaker 1:So we can go to.
Speaker 2:Burlington, there's two in Mississauga. All three of those stores are insane. They're the busiest places on earth. Could be Just absolutely insane. So we will drive 45 minutes to Stoney Creek across the Burlin skyway. That costco it's right on the highway and on its worst day, busy saturday. Still better than those ones. We will drive for orville, either we'll go up to guelph. There's one from the north end of guelph.
Speaker 1:We'll go up there. That's your dad right there the extra at least.
Speaker 4:Yeah, like to avoid people
Speaker 3:just avoid when you're in your yeah, yeah if you can't get a good drive and you know it's like there's it's not a highway drive, it's like a good country drive. I'll fucking go anywhere to avoid a crowd that's it anywhere. Yeah, I'll drive an hour and a half.
Speaker 1:If I don't have to wait in line, it doesn't make any sense it takes a gas, but hey, whatever so one of your quotes reminded me of something that I saw for a tiktok quote recently for advice for parents. I haven't tried this out yet, so that's my disclaimer, but I do want to try it out this week. So the quote of don't try to uh, the worst time to try to teach somebody how to swim is when they're drowning. So this was along the lines of when your kid's in a fit and they're in a temper tantrum and you're trying to get them out of it, and the urge that we have as parents to raise our voice and to yell because you think I need to get their attention and snap them out of this, and how psychologically that does not work. It never works with kids because they're not in a state where they can hear or understand you, and then yelling them just sends farther into that fight or flight. I think I know where this is going. You probably do, because we have the same TikTok feed.
Speaker 3:I'm not surprised.
Speaker 1:I thought we were supposed to just get on our knee, hold their hand no that doesn't work either, because when they're gone, they're gone If I think I know what he's talking about.
Speaker 4:I've tried it, so it's going to be fun. Oh, I love this.
Speaker 1:I don't doubt that you would have tried this almost immediately.
Speaker 3:They get injured together. They buy the same wedding gifts, yeah 100% Cards. We're the same person, same.
Speaker 1:TikTok feed. I'm just average height and he's a freak. So the neuroscience answer for dealing with your kids in that moment is to sing. So you're supposed to sing in order to get them out of it. What? Because, apparently, singing when you're hearing someone sing is the only time you use your prefrontal cortex at the same time as the other part of your brain that actually does reasoning.
Speaker 4:This works with adults as well.
Speaker 1:We had this conversation with our electrician.
Speaker 3:What song?
Speaker 4:And I said every time that I need you to fix something, I'm just going to sing it to you.
Speaker 3:So you're not mad at me about it, so you're not singing a song.
Speaker 1:You're just singing what you're saying so when you need them, to tie their shoelaces and they're losing their shit.
Speaker 3:Maybe you sing it into them. Do you want to know what's crazy? Do you want to know what's wild about that? Sorry to interrupt your song. My son knows how to spell his name because I sang it to him on one car ride and it was the most awkward. The tune doesn't make any sense, but he, when you ask him how to spell his name, he sings it.
Speaker 4:I guarantee you one of my nieces, her name's Berkley. When she learned how to spell her name, it was B-E-R-K. L-e-i-g-h. And I guarantee, if you asked her how to spell her name. That's how she would say it.
Speaker 1:I didn't put those together because it was the same thing with my son Cooper. It was C-O-O-P-E-R.
Speaker 3:My son's Maverick and he goes M-A-V-E-R, i-c-k. It's like a random thing, but he holds the R for soul.
Speaker 4:M-A-V-E-R.
Speaker 3:I-C-K. Every time I'll record it.
Speaker 2:He'll never forget how to spell his name, but he doesn't, though, and that's.
Speaker 3:it's so funny that you say that, because I know that it I know that it works for something, for something.
Speaker 1:So apparently this is the way to get them, can help get them out of that state of mind, because it ignites those two parts of their brain so that they have to pay attention and it gets them out of that kind of fight or flight I find very similarly with my kids, like my son, especially when he'll wake up in the middle of the night, screaming, crying.
Speaker 2:I want to go on, I don't want to sleep, and just freaking out, right you punch him in the distraction just pure distraction, get his mind off something else. So I come in pick him up, give him a hug. Are you okay, buddy? Would you like some water?
Speaker 2:yes, get him drinking some water, the waterworks go away, fall asleep, or put him back down. He can fall asleep if you can distract them on onto something completely different. Yes, they will tend to calm down and and move on to whatever the next subject is. Um, the caveat being if that doesn't work, it really doesn't work.
Speaker 4:If they come back to what that was then.
Speaker 4:no distraction is ever going to work, so the thing that I thought you were going to say is a very similar post about switching their neural pathways. And this person said to play a game where you can start naming things, things that are a certain color in the room, because then it's getting them to think and focus on something different, on the color, and it is switching that neural pathway the same way as the song is doing. And he was like you'd have to try this with your kid and if they won't play, just start naming things that aren't that color, so like if it's green is the color.
Speaker 4:He's like you just watch, a toddler will not make it past like five things that you say wrong. They'll start to correct you. And I did this with my daughter. She was having a meltdown it might have even been one of the swimming class meltdowns even and I'm like, okay, let's play a game, let's start naming things in the room, and then like wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong.
Speaker 4:And she's like dad, that's not even close and like, but like it diffused the tantrum and got her into exploratory and thinking mode instead of that tantrum mode, and then you can re-evaluate it. But now I've done it too many times, so now she's like dad we're not doing that again.
Speaker 1:I'm having my health exactly that's the thing with all the pieces of parenting advice.
Speaker 2:They all have shelf life I spy would work too right, yes, get them playing a game or looking for something.
Speaker 3:Right, it's so funny though, like robin sent me. Uh, my wife sent me a post like a shared thing and it was this video meme thing, whatever, and it said the same. Or sorry, a kid hearing the words it's bedtime sounds, or it's the same as if you hear a fire alarm. It's like the same reaction, yeah.
Speaker 1:It feels like it.
Speaker 3:Um. So instead of saying, like it's bedtime and this, I was just not in the right frame of mind when I got this thing. Okay, this video pissed me off so much because this lady is sitting here and she's like it's bad for the kids and I think. So, like 90 minutes before bedtime, you have to dim all the lights in your thing and you're and you're basically gradually getting them ready.
Speaker 2:I'm like bitch who has the time. Sorry for calling you a bitch, I'm sorry for saying that I didn't mean.
Speaker 3:We got the set of it.
Speaker 1:You were calling her a bitch. That was a general.
Speaker 3:I don't like saying that towards people. That's fair. Motherfucker who has the time? That's better.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean?
Speaker 4:That motherfucker who is that you know what I mean? That's like great.
Speaker 1:What do you mean? 100%?
Speaker 3:that's the only one I got to. It was like an 8 minute video and I was like you expect me to watch this. You resonated with this that you sent it to me like as if I need to fucking watch this that came from your wife.
Speaker 4:I thought it. It was just a post that you saw.
Speaker 2:No.
Speaker 4:You think we're going to be able to accomplish this?
Speaker 1:How long do?
Speaker 4:you think it would take her to be like? Wire the lights to him. Turn the lights back on.
Speaker 3:I wouldn't even make it to the switch. She'd be like where the fuck are you?
Speaker 2:going.
Speaker 1:You are not leaving me here with these two Rewind. What are you talking about? It's bedtime and then fucking pandemonium 90 minutes before it's even bedtime.
Speaker 2:And on top of that, she has no idea how much work it is to install dimmers on every single light.
Speaker 1:She had to dim the whole house down. Smart switches to control your phone.
Speaker 3:Yeah, she's gonna dim the whole house down smart switches to control your phone literally I saw this one thing and I was like, are you fucking kidding me like? This is why I don't watch any of the reels that you send me, because it triggers me like this that's what she thinks she's supposed to do.
Speaker 4:That's what I find interesting. When people see something like that or like, oh, this is what we're supposed to do, it's like you think you're getting the advice that you want, but it's not really going to match your lifestyle.
Speaker 1:Well searching for the answers to parenting. Yes, guess what there aren't any there's going to be little tricks that work sometimes, and then they're not going to work other times, and it's just about figuring it out as you go along, freaking out as little as you can and apologizing when you do.
Speaker 4:And that's parenting and just going for my ice cream when you need to, or Krispy Kremes.
Speaker 1:Shout out to Paul Cronin for bringing Krispy.
Speaker 3:Kremes you send. You only send funny videos or like the like I love you videos. You don't send like hey, you need to be doing better. And this is exactly step by step on what you need to do. You don't send those.
Speaker 1:You give a breakdown of them. You don't send them. You send me a video of like a fucking guy pooping on a shoe or tripping an elderly person. I'm gonna, I'm gonna be like, yes, I know why you sent it to me.
Speaker 3:That's my boy, yeah my wife sends me a video, and if it's not, like a we're getting lucky tonight. It's like okay, why'd she send this to me?
Speaker 1:that's true too so you're expecting a different kind of thing, yeah yeah, that reminds me of a very funny meme video. Okay.
Speaker 2:Where someone sends someone a get better soon card and it's not because they're sick, it's because they can be better.
Speaker 3:Get better soon. Get better. I'm going to find the things that I send my wife.
Speaker 4:Oh, maybe not.
Speaker 1:Put down the audio of the kids in the car.
Speaker 4:I send my wife a lot of call-out memes for sure, oh yeah. It's like this is you that's what.
Speaker 2:I'm saying you send those call out things this is what I send.
Speaker 3:This is an old guy on a wheelchair.
Speaker 2:He's woken up to another old lady and just smacks her butt. That's what I send her.
Speaker 3:I love it, everyone's seen it, because that's, that's what I'm saying.
Speaker 2:I sent my wife one last week and it was so. It's a husband and wife at a grocery store and she's looking at tomatoes and putting them in the bag and he grabs a tomato and he hands it to the wife. She looks at it, puts it down. So then he grabs one that she's already put in the bag and hands it back to her.
Speaker 4:She looks at it no, not good. No, even hands her one she's already approved.
Speaker 2:It's not good enough.
Speaker 4:I love it how he just turns and smirks at the camera too.
Speaker 3:Okay, ready, here's what I send my wife. Are you a pinky toe? Because you're cute and I'm probably going to bang you on a coffee table later.
Speaker 2:That's what I send my wife.
Speaker 1:You want to know what she sends me.
Speaker 3:Hard pill to swallow. You manage your tone in meetings, but lose it with a five year old. Fuck you newly wedded wife.
Speaker 4:It's going great. It's Father's Day.
Speaker 2:I sent her this one.
Speaker 3:It's this cool little fucking hack with a bungee cord to hang the things on the iPad on the back of the thing. You know what she says Hard pill to swallow.
Speaker 4:Your tone of voice is wiring your children's nervous system so they're the most innovative company, coming in with new products all the time.
Speaker 3:They've got lots of great color options, for you was your daddy a baker Because you got some nice buns you know what else is nice.
Speaker 1:Textured black by Replay.
Speaker 4:It is a matte black finish with a little light texture to it and it is beautiful railing you wouldn't believe. But black actually disappears into the horizon more than white. White stands out a little bit more. So if you're, looking for your railing to blend with your backdrop. A little bit more black could be a good answer for you.
Speaker 1:In urban rail they actually have matte white too. I really like that color. That's really nice Not to fuse the situation.
Speaker 2:You got really fired up there for a minute. I heard crystal rail is beautiful.
Speaker 4:It's a great rail, nothing between you and the view. We got to go golfing with Andrew Penelitis.
Speaker 1:He just full named him. Hopefully I got it right. I think it's the first time.
Speaker 4:We got to golf with him and the new CEO and president of Home Hardware. At Home Hardware they've got a vendor golf tournament, so we got to go golfing with them and Andrew's just loving the show, and so we're super grateful for his support.
Speaker 1:Did you truth gun him?
Speaker 4:Ask him if he's ever actually listened to it.
Speaker 2:No, he's never listened.
Speaker 4:He has me and Joey listed as the same person in the phone on his phone too. So when he calls us, he's like hey guys.
Speaker 2:We've called him out on it. Now the contact's just bro-loss.
Speaker 3:Exactly I'm pretty sure he's asked me which one's which. Which one's which.
Speaker 4:We didn't have to sign an NDA, but he did hold us hostage to make sure we wouldn't share it. But there is some interesting stuff that they've got working on the pipeline. He told me about it. It's really easy oh okay, me about it, it's really easy.
Speaker 3:Okay, I'm not a little bit of a fan. That's a new innovation coming from Regal Ideas.
Speaker 4:We don't know how long it'll take to get here, but they're working on some cool, exciting new railing stuff. I was just going to say it.
Speaker 1:I was swiping over here. How do we lose a sponsorship?
Speaker 3:It was definitely well, posco, on a Saturday, do not advise. His favorite thing is to they have like legit fish, dead fish with eyes still in it, oh, wow, and he loves it. I'm embarrassed because he's in his like cart and he goes. Can we see the dead fish? Dead fish dead fish. Dead fish and we're like anyways, he starts his dead fish?
Speaker 1:chant.
Speaker 3:No one dead fish and we're like, anyways, he starts his dead fish chant. No one else is chanting, so now I have this temper tantrum. It would be weird if people joined in.
Speaker 1:I'd probably join in, though, if I heard a kid chanting that in Costco.